Thursday, May 21, 2015

Paying The Right Price After Divorce

I am 35, and I am watching many friends and family going through the dreaded D already. Yes, the BIG dreaded D! DIVORCE. It is an all age range issue lately, and the reasons are all over the board as well. Why the hell did you even get married in the first place?! In my opinion, marriage is taken so lightly nowadays and it has lost most of its weight. It has become nothing but a word in our vocabulary, and a piece of paper for the majority of people.

Lately, marriage is used for; people to immigrate who are unhappy where they are, an excuse for women to make their girlfriends jealous and have thousands upon thousands spent on them in the form of a ring and dream wedding, an outlet to piss off family and friends who think the new significant other is unworthy of their friend or family member. All of this, is childish crap. When did marriage take this turn?! The only good turn that marriage has made is that slowly, all around the world, same sex marriage is becoming a legal thing FINALLY!

So, you think 'Why not get married? There is always divorce.' Well yes, there is. However, if children are involved especially, you are still stuck with this person for life. You will be gathering for school concerts, you will have to pay child support or be a single parent, and later on at your own childs happenings in their adult years as well. So technically, you are still with the person you married and had children with for LIFE.

I am watching my friends and family go through some horrible things during and after the divorce is final, and my biggest pet peeve is those greedy women who feel they need EVERYTHING! Keeping the house, the newest vehicle, most all the furniture, financial assets (such as stocks, bonds, joint money and half the husbands pension) household goods, even the family pet, yet they feel they deserve and need more money still. So they say they need more money for the child for their programs or school outings etc. I have a friend who was told he needed to pay half of his daughters school trip, and his half was $2500. This was a lie by his ex wife, the trips total cost was $2000. I hear this all the time from so many of my male friends, so here divorced dads, let me help you like I have helped so many!


  • Your child is still your child. You can call the school or daycare and find out the actual cost of things so that you know the proper 'half' to pay.
  • Make checks payable to the school, program, or facility that it is intended for and NOT your ex-wife. You can even mail it or drop it off yourself.
  • You do NOT need to pay more than maintenance enforcement/child support has told you to. Yeah, yeah, I know your ex says bad things to you and says your child is suffering, but your child is only suffering because your ex wife is not doing her financial share. Don't fall for it! There is nothing wrong with paying your half of costs for school etc if paid directly to them and not to your ex. She needs to come up with her half too.
  • Change everything to HER name only. If she kept the car, don't keep your name on the lease or loan. 
  • Do not buy your ex wife anything more. She does not need you to finance a new car or furniture for HER house. Remember when she signed the divorce papers? That means she can do it on her own. 
  • Be involved in your kids life. That doesn't mean coming over to your ex wives house to spend time with your child, it means taking your child from there and doing things with them and they spend time at YOUR place


Above all, just BE A GOOD DAD so your kids will learn from having a good male role model around just in case your ex wife picks up some real losers and they are being your childs male role model. Move on with your life and stay in touch with your child, you don't always need your ex wife to be the middle man. You two are stuck parenting together.

It is AhMewsing to me that so many women act like this, helping make a stigma for every woman.  A good woman will not push you into getting married, or put her hands all over your wallet more than she does you.

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